Year IV Month XII (3-4) - Daughter Diary

Sometimes you feel as if you are managing too many things at the same time confusing non priorities with priorities and so on. This has exactly been the problem for me when it comes to writing something regularly on my blog. It is not that I lack the will to continue. I like writing and the satisfaction it brings is immense. It is like meditation- you know you will feel better doing it but you procrastinate and laze around finding one excuse or another. I could only write a small paragraph last Sunday and this Sunday is now also gone by the blink. Finding an hour for my dear blog should not have been so difficult. 

Ridhima is all excited about her fifth birthday. She has been asking me sit with her and plan what is cake we are ordering and who all will come for the party. Whether we will go out to celebrate it or organize a home party. Eating out is not easy in Mumbai you can get ripped off for an otherwise average food in an ordinary restaurant. We have had such experiences in the past.

Rinku has been insisting for the house party and it sounds to be a good idea- you get good food and you do not have to sell a kidney for it. The problem is Rinku would be overloaded with work and by the time we all gather to have fun she would already be totally spent. This is not a happy scene either.

Ridhima has already selected the chocolate she will distribute in her class. Class reminds me of the parent meeting happened last Saturday (30^th June 2018) in Ridhima’s school. Ridhima and I went to attend it. It was mostly a session about how good the school is and why the hefty fee is but inevitable. A veiled attempt for all parents to get out of the got-ripped-off mode. Kalvinder Kaur, one of Ridhima’s class teachers informed us that our kids will surely be like Americans or at least will sound like them. They needed our support achieving that dream. I felt disheartened and I wanted to leave…

Year IV Month XII (1-2) - Daughter Diary

We thought of saving a few grand (Rs. 6000) on the school fee and paid the entire amount for a year at one go. Its been 3 months since Ridhima went to her senior KG and she has hardly attended her school for a week. The summer vacation has again been extended from 11 June to the 18 June siting some flimsy infrastructure issues. We are regretting paying the hefty amount. We should have changed the school altogether.

Ridhima, on the other hand, is happy staying back at home making her life better with her toys and the books given to her by her school. She already has mugged most of her yearly syllabus and knows most of the lessons and more. Youtube is still close to her heart and she can forget everything watching 'Pepa Pig' a cartoon series with a heavy Britsh accent. I asked her once if she at all understands the foreign language called English and she nodded 'yes' watching the next episode. She knows the words and sentences well, so much so she loves the original series in English more than the Hindi version that comes on the TV, once in a while. I don't know where my girl is headed to.

Take this, I after so much resistance from my peers and my college got my admission into BA in English Literature. I swear to god, I didn't understand a thing for two long months, what the classes were for and what the lecturers used to talk about. It took me months to figure out how to understand the language. I look at Ridhima today with sheer disbelief.

This is not only about language but the level of exposure kids have got to learn and understand their world. The Internet has been a catalyst no doubt in the phenomenal growth story of human civilization. 

With her uncle

Year IV Month XI (4) - Daughter Diary

Last one week was fun, it appears, as Ridhima looked busy as well as happy at her maternal house in Pune. We came back to Mumbai together yesterday (Sunday) and she is taking her time reclaiming her toys, books, and whatnots since. I have been keeping up the home as per my standards and  Rinku, as usual, was thoroughly unimpressed by my housekeeping skills. I tried compensating it by cooking a simple meal for all of us. I wanted to make up move on. Its been more than 24 hrs since we reached Mumbai and Rinku is still busy making her house a home. A perfectionist she is. I rather look at the mundane household chores from a more philosophical point of view - what is the use of it if everything has to be dirty again. I am sure, some of you would rather find it to be en echo of your own voice. This is perfectly fine.  

The rains are almost here with a couple of spells of heavy pre-monsoon showers as if setting the scene. I for one was not sure that it would rain so early in June and was caught unprepared when I came out of my office at around 8pm it was raining incessantly making my journey home a bit difficult. I braved the first rain of this season well, drenching myself completely while coming back on my reliable motorbike. All it took was 10 minutes but that was enough to take away all the summer heat leaving me pleasantly surprised.

Her recent creation

The Summer Vacation of Ridhima has been just been elongated by more than a week and she is loving it.

Breaking, she just now fell down on the floor from the sofa and injured her lower lip. I rushed in between my blog to find some cotton to wipe the blood off her lips. She kept crying for a while and now she is busy with her mom in the other room. Her Mom and she herself like to check their clothes at least a couple of times a day. The large mirror helps them try them too. Birds of same feather fly together!.

The discussion on how we will celebrate her next birthday of Ridhima is going to be the most important topic of my life for the next one month. Braving this is tougher than braving the rains. I am keeping my legs and fingers crossed.

Year IV Month XI (3) - Daughter Diary

It was in August 2017 (eight months back) when I last went to Pune. Something or the other kept on happening and I kept postponing my plans. So much so that my parents were here for almost 6 six months and I could not take them there. My Fufaji has not been happy because of all this. He is a social man who loves to sit with people on a drink and talk about things. When I go there I mostly play a listener and that works perfectly for him. An ex-army man, the biggest fear in his life is of becoming old, he just does not want to fall into that trap. He will keep on asking how I remain fit and why I haven't got belly-fat yet. Sporadic running and yoga keep him going. Not that he is not fit or he is old, at 55 (a wild guess) he is pretty active. Its been a while since I sat with him.

This is the last week of Ridhima's Summer Holiday and she was willing to go to Pune. So much so that without a plan we had to leave on Saturday 26th May. We ended up catching a cab that whiled away a lot of time finding passengers and getting CNG and Petrol (both at different refilling stations) for the journey. We also had a narrow escape on the Mumbai-Pune Expressway when due to the summer heat one of the tires gave away. Luckily the driver didn't lose control and managed to pull the vehicle out of the road albeit on the wrong side.

We left Mumbai around 10.30 am and it was only 4.30 pm when we reached Pune. Yes, we stopped at Pune station and had our lunch. It was really really good food, the Dal and Masala Papad was incredible. Pune wasn't any kinder and it was hot out there. The only saving grace was lesser humidity levels.

The row house in Pune has more space and kids need exactly that. You need ground and some fresh air to create a world of your own where the tiny toys and the dear dolls start speaking your language. You are not affected by the ways of the world. Ridhima almost stops watching Youtube and TV once she gets into such an environment. Nothing beats if there are kids of her age are around. She has a couple of friends in Pune as well and she was almost at home there.

I sat with Ridhima in the afternoon on Sunday when her mother was taking her siesta. I asked her if she would be fine if I return next week and we all go back to Mumbai together. She agreed and was happy to spend a week in Pune with just one rider - I needed to bring a lot of chocolates. I was sorted. I left at around 6pm on Sunday and reached Mumbai by 10.30 pm. Had a shower and went to bed to be ready for Monday.

Year IV Month XI (2) - Daughter Diary

There seems to be no respite from this summer heat. The humidity in Mumbai adds to the misery forcing people to stay indoors. We switched on the ac a little early today at around 2.30 pm and Ridhima still at 6.30 pm finds it difficult to open her two little eyes. Still lazing around on the bed forgetful about the time, forgetful about the world too. There are a couple of guests staying with us for the last one week.  I had been busy with work the entire last week and there was no way but to brave the sun on a Saturday (Yesterday) to take them along for site seeing. Obviously, Ridhima and her mom accompanied us. 

Ridhima told us categorically that she would go to a beach where she could make sand castles and that precisely means 2 extra hours. We couldn't find parking at The Gateway of India and moved on to Marine Drive there too it was difficult to park. Weekends are earning time for the policemen as well and they would hunt down any possibility to get money. We kept on seeing things from afar. Fortunately, we found a place to park our vehicle near Girgaon Chowpati that too on the opposite side of the road at least a kilometer away from the beach. 

All of us had a good time there. Ridhima kept herself busy with the site and sounds of the beach. Was she prepared! She bought her sand bucket along to build the castle she talked about early in the day. She couldn't have it enough. A couple of hours passed as if minutes and she was still not ready to leave. We finally had to talk chocolates to get her attention. It was 7.30 pm when we left the beach to head home. 

There is an old saying that says, there are two ways to impart knowledge either you educate your child or you make her see places. Nothing beats experience.

Year IV Month XI (1) - Daughter Diary

May is a difficult month in Mumbai and if you have a terrace flat it becomes worse in the afternoon. Despite all resistance, I had to switch the ac on, so that Ridhima finds some respite and takes a siesta. She doesn't want to rest in the afternoon and it has been difficult for Rinku and me to keep her in one place so that she calms herself down and goes to sleep. What happens otherwise is, by the time it is 7 in the evening she starts feeling sleepy. She wouldn't even care for a glass of milk. We do not want her to sleep the entire night with an empty stomach.

Today is Sunday and after trying all that we could to let her sleep we finally gave up and I had to switch the ac on. Albeit her mom and I have decided not to talk to her so that she does not open her chatterbox and whiles away the entire afternoon, again. She is one little mischievous girl. She knows how to talk sweet and get things done the way she wants them to. "Pappa please switch off the wifi and data, I don't want any of them, I will manage with games only." You give your smartphone to her and within a moment she will cuddle herself in a corner and start watching ChuChu TV on Youtube. You cannot trust her rolling eyes.  

And she is now awake, yes this is all the time she has spent sleeping. 30 mins at the max. Let me help her sleep again...

Yesterday when she woke up late in the morning her Mom complained, "Beta! You went to sleep very early in the evening and didn't eat anything. For God's sake please sleep in the afternoons." She replied out of her bed with a lazy voice, "What was the menu last night, Mamma." And I was like, seriously!  

She wants to do everything all by herself. She will dress herself up in a blink and she knows what matches with what. The Summer Holiday has made her all the more creative.

She is now completely awake, ready with her color-clay (she bought yesterday) to add some more fun to the moments of her beautiful life. She talks to her toys as if they speak with her, she is so involved in what she does. I swear by this careless, fearless age when all you care is what you love and what you feel like doing. Everything else is less important and can wait.

Nothing matters more than now. The biggest problem with us is, we think there is time.

Year IV Month X (4) - Daughter Diary

Its been a month since I joined Reliance and it has been a learning experience so far. The office is huge and the work seems to be cool too. The best part, it is 10 mins from where I live. You cannot expect more from your life living in Mumbai. Sparing yourself from the daily grind (road and rail commute) is the biggest blessing you can get if you want to be a part of this metropolis. Ridhima from our conversation knows that her Papa has changed office and since the day one had been pretty curious to go see how her pappa's office also one of the biggest corporate offices in India looks like. 

Looking at the process orientation and an office culture that defines every movement to the core I was little hesitant asking permission to make my family take a tour. To my surprise, on a Saturday morning, we reached the main gate of RCP (Reliance Corporate Park), that's what they call it, asked permission from the security there and we were let in without any hassle. Thanks to the summer heat, we headed to the mall first to cool ourselves off, did some shopping, saw a couple of things and headed home. She was happy and I won.

27th April 2018 was Ridhima's last day in school before summer vacation starts and she had been counting that day from I don't know how many weeks. She doesn't understand the calendar much but kept on asking the date multiple times a day. I have joined Reliance recently and we have no plans for a holiday, unfortunately. I have been persuading Rinku to pay a visit to my parents but this plan well remains a plan so far. We are thinking to send her to the summer camp that is being organized by her school and make sure she learns something and doesn't get bored sitting at home. Something should be finalized by tomorrow. 

Ridhima is a talkative child and a busy one. She wants to play all the time and matching her energy sometimes becomes a problem for us. I think that's where I miss my own parents who were here until February and were so much engaged with Ridhima that she didn't even need to miss her parents. It was a win-win for both my parents and my Ridima. My parents needed somebody to talk to and  Ridhima needed the same for her never-ending stories. They made a very good company. The result is, still today, Ridhima is not happy with her grandma because she left her when she was sleeping. Ridhima still cries when she sees her on a video call. 

Living with your old parents still makes a lot of sense. Nothing matches the unconditional love and affection you receive from them. Nothing matches camaraderie they can share with your child- their grandchild. I feel so lucky myself. 

We should have schools where retired people/grandparents should work as the teachers. They match the vibe of the toddlers so well and it creates a perfect combination of a wholesome growth of kids. I am wondering why we have not started it yet.  

Year IV Month X (3) - Daughter Diary

I have been trying my best to take Ridhima to my morning Yoga classes but have not been successful so far. Yes! She accompanied her mother a couple of times and saw me practicing Yoga but that is about it. I have tried teaching her some Asanas and other fun stuff and she practices them once in a while. It's been more than a year since I did my certification and started taking yoga classes for free. I must confess the journey has been absolutely satisfying and in the last one year, I have many happy stories to share. I will keep on talking about them, going forward. 

So much so that I got Rinku certified to be a Yoga teacher herself. She hasn't started her class yet but has been contemplating to start one. I have seen a place for her and got the necessary permission too, it is just that the date is not yet finalized and we have not started as yet. I am sure Ridhima will get good vibes out of all this.

I want to let Ridhima know that service to others is the easiest way to achieve success. Satisfaction comes from giving it back to where you have received it, completing the circle of existence. Life cannot be a linear progression where you keep on running and then you fall at the end. Life is about coming back to where you belong. What goes around must come around. 

The last one week of April has been tough, the scorching sun and the summer heat has been at its peak. Being Sunday evening, I switched on the air-conditioner a bit early today so that we go to sleep on time and start our working day afresh. Ridhima loves the AC as much, she left her cartoon show on TV alone and sneaked into the bedroom. We already had our lunch and it was time to have our glass of milk and catch our forty winks. She wanted me to hold her glass so that she continues what she had been doing but I was insisting that she had become a big girl so she should help herself finishing the milk.

I tried making her understand how she is an elder sister to so many kids and they all drink milk on their own. One should learn to be independent. I saw her becoming very emotional by then. Keeping her head down she said, "I don't want to grow up." I thought it was just another tantrum she is throwing and I continued by asking "Why Beta?" "Don't you want to ride a bicycle or drive a car on your own, or think of helping us when we become old." She started to cry saying that she just doesn't want to grow up. She backed up her point by giving an example of her Mausi's marriage when Mausi had to leave her parents' house and had to cry so much. 

How could she remember all this, for she was barely 2.5 years old at that time? Girls are sharp, you see!

I was not able to fathom how she is connecting these things. She said she will not let us grow old too. Almost instructed me to color my hair regularly so that I look younger and remain so. Also, she would not mind helping us through it all.

Who doesn't want to stay young anyway, I shall color my hair first thing in the morning tomorrow. Have to see you guys off till then. Ta ta!        

Year IV Month X (2) - Daughter Diary

Time flies. Its been more than a year since I wrote something for my diary and my daughter. From Preschool she has now cleared her Kindergarten I with flying colors, winning six certificates in total in various competitions and otherwise. The best was, when she got the first prize for her small little speech on her 'favorite sports person' and then on 'save water'. I have been a proud father so far adding one feather at a time in the hat call fatherhood with the head held high.

Here is what she said in her 'Save Water' speech emphasizing on supporting 'Rally for Rivers':

'Rally for Rivers' by Ridhima

The pass out formality for K1 is also over and she has successfully been moved to K2. A feather in her farther's cap. The pass out group photograph is below for reference. I am leaving it to Ridhima to find herself in the picture when she grows up:

Enough of boasting, isn't it? 

Its been a rocky ride professionally where despite working very hard things didn't move as it should have been. But that's how life should be, nothing should ever be predictable. All plans should not be successful. Success makes us arrogant, it is the failures that keep us grounded and teach about life the most. 

The clouds of despair will always end with a silver line. Patience is the word how our planet works. We should keep learning practicing patience and keep improving ourselves.

My dad always used to tell one old saying that can loosely be translated as 'either you educate your child or let her see the world by travelling.' The last one year, despite all hardships we managed to travel fairly well. Below is one such photograph on our way to Balaji Temple near Pune.

  

We then went to some other places and she has a plenty of stories to tell. She repeats her stories so much that we now wish to vanish before she opens her mouth for one. My parents had been here in Mumbai since November and she enjoyed their company to the fullest. What happened is, she became even more playful and naughty in last almost six months till her grandparents were here.

She picks up things fast and now can write sentences on her own. She hums are own songs and discusses Maths scaring the hell out of me. Mathematics and I have always been two completely different things, never destined to meet. Things look grimmer when I ponder over her math questions when she grows up. Why do we study Maths?

I have recently joined a new organisation and want to make some time at least once a week to continue adding to my dear daughter's diary. 

Year III Month VIII (3) - Daughter Diary

Yesterday was the last day of Ridhima at her first school and they had a ‘pajama party’ in the evening. Not that I know anything about a pajama party. I reached home from my office and came to know that she was still in school, anxiety was written all over my face, I mean what does a three and half-year-old kiddo do in a party that is, of all things, called a pajama party? Is this just the beginning? Perhaps I am overreacting to it but let it be a heart to heart conversation, I was my best grumpy self. Am I old school? 

I became busy just after freshening myself up asking Rinku to pick Ridhima up as 8 pm – she was insisting I should go. I recharged my internet connection on my way back from office and she had to do a lot of catching up with her updates. I begged her a bit more and she agreed. 

There is a new project I am working on currently and that is apart from the regular work I do in the office. The project seems to be exciting and need I say, Laptop and I are enjoying a great camaraderie these days. 

Ridhima graduated from her play school and now she will go to her regular school may be from next month. 

She had all sparkles in her tiny little eyes when she reached home with a huge picture she had been handed over by the school. I still don’t know what a pajama party would be like but the way she came back all happy, it must have been something worthwhile.

The playschool